Tuesday, April 29, 2008

DON'T CALL ME A CULT

My agent tells me that because of the huge following I am attracting here in Blogland, I am becoming something of a cult.

No way, I said. I am just an ordinary guy who wants to share his philosophy with the world. I am not a cult.

Well, he said, that's a matter of opinion.

We left it there as I had a dental appointment.

Funnily enough, though, you know the trouble we have had in selling Wynorrin, because of the slump in the housing market? Well, I have just recieved a handsome offer from a religious sect: The Seventh Day Adventriloquists; they speak in tongues - without moving their lips.
If you don't believe me, log on to their website: www.dummies.org.uk.

I'm not going to accept the offer. They are a cult, and I do not want the family home sullied with that sort of thing.

Anyway, I am not keen on religion, whatever the flavour. More on this later.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

BOO!

I would like to thank all those people who have sent cards, ‘get well’ messages and (in one case) flowers!
And to those that haven’t – up yours.

I would also like to contradict reports in certain newspapers that I am going to sue the St Moritz Tobogganing Club.

Not true. I accept full responsibility for what happened.

When one embarks on the Cresta Run one is given a full breakdown (bad choice of words) on the dangers attached thereto.

They even told me about that poor chap who hit a marker post and lost a foot. They found it, buried in the snow, but it was too late to stitch it on again. It did not deter him. In fact 'Shorty' is now one of the club's most popular members - along with 'Lefty', 'Squinty' and'Fingers'.

One good thing though: I ‘went out’ at Shuttlecock, and this entitles me to become a member of the Shuttlecock Club and wear a Shuttlecock tie.
I don’t normally wear a tie but perhaps I could use this one to hold my trousers up. How’s that for style?

I have been doing a bit of browsing and here are some blogs I have come across:


www.sparrowchat.blogspot.com
www.littlepenguinsteps.blogspot.com
www.skeptico.blogspot.com
www.effectwithoutcause.blogspot.com


They do witter on a bit, but when you’ve got nothing to do you will read anything.