The lesbian says I should see a psychotherapist. Just because I came down to breakfast and remarked that I felt menaced by the tea-pot. It is a particularly large one, given to us as a wedding present by her mother.
I am not going of course. I agree with Sam Goldwyn: Anyone who visits a psychotherapist needs his head examining.
They have got a new condom machine in the toilets at the 'Jolly Pervert'. You have a choice of 4 - one of them being labelled "extra safe". And the thought crossed my mind: does that mean that the others are less safe?
I said to old whatsname - the landlady who chucked me out that time - that really the others should be labelled too. For example, "Fairly Safe", "A Bit Risky" and "You're Taking A Chance". Something like that.
She gave me that withering stare, for which she is famous - along with her dumplings, of course.
Isn't life a bugger, sometimes.
George
Monday, April 11, 2005
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