Why does everybody call me Big-head?

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I was reading a book this morning,  Anna - I haven’t read for a while because I can’t concentrate - and I thought to myself, every time I read a book my head expands a bit. You wouldn’t notice it; it’s too small even to measure. But it does – it expands. Well, to be more accurate, more scientific, it is my brain that expands, but in expanding it pushes my skull that little bit further forward. This is, of course, the reason why a human has a bigger forehead than his simian cousin. (Have you ever, when visiting the zoo, seen a monkey sitting down quietly, reading a book? No, neither have I – they’re either scratching themselves or showing you their bottom.)

Now, my reason for mentioning this important relationship between learning and cranium size is do with evolution. Or, rather, to suggest a possible leap forward in our evolutionary process. Suppose we humans could evolve is such a way that puberty (for male and female) occurred much later in life. Let’s say, around 30 years old – or even older. Just think how many more books we could have read; how much further our brains expanded and, crucially, how this expansion could be passed on genetically. Instead of evolution being such a slow process, it would suddenly be accelerated. Instead of it being in tiny incremental steps over millions of years, evolution would become exponential.

Of course, this would involve our heads becoming bigger and bigger but we would soon get used to this. Our vastly increased knowledge (not just scientific but philosophical, psychological, sociological and humanistic.) would help us to quickly come to terms with the radical change in our appearance.

Obviously some people read more than others and now they would be recognisable by their (considerably) larger heads. For the first time in the history of the species, intellectuality would be manifested in physical appearance. It follows, that the big-heads would be attracted to each other now on a physical as well as intellectual basis. They would, therefore, tend to partner with their own kind and the resultant offspring would be advanced exponentially (of their parents), not only intellectually, but in head size.

You might ask me: But how would the physical body keep up with all this? How would it develop so as to become strong enough to support a gigantic head?

My reply to you would be: Do you want me to do everything for you? I’ve given you the main idea – the blueprint. Don’t be so bloody lazy. Work it out for yourselves!

I haven’t taken my medication for ten days. They think I’m taking it but when they’re not looking I drop it down my pyjama top. (I’ve got to wear these damn things in here but, as you know, Anna, I wear nothing in bed. I cannot bear being restricted by clothing of any kind.)

Anyway, when they have gone I put the pills in the tin I used to keep my resin in. I’ve got quite a collection now - for a ‘rainy day’. Know what I mean? Nudge, nudge. Wink, wink!

I have had some disturbing - even distressing - news which has set me back a bit. I cannot bring myself to tell you about it now - I am too depressed.

Looking forward to hearing from you.

Love, as always

George